A touch of insanity

goodnight ppls :3

Fri, 24 May 2013 22:43:21 +1000

goodnight ppls :3

COUNSELLING BLOG: How to Stop Being a People Pleaser

Fri, 24 May 2013 22:35:20 +1000

COUNSELLING BLOG: How to Stop Being a People Pleaser:

Do you always give in, or let other people choose, or hide what you think, or never ask to have your way? Perhaps you fear disapproval or disappointing others, and the last thing you want is to make somebody mad. If this profile describes you then you may be a people pleaser … and maybe it is time to stand up for yourself. Below are some tips that can help you with this:

1. Think of five occasions when you’ve said or done something that didn’t really match up with your own wants and needs – but you ignored those in order to please somebody else. Now, take the time to think through what else you could have done to get what you wanted, instead of caving in. Ask yourself “What is the worst thing that could possibly have happened? What were my worst fears, and were they realistic fears?”

2. Examine your fears in a balanced way. Would it really be so awful if a friend got annoyed? Do you need that type of person? What if they walk away? There are lots of other people who won’t demand compliance but will accept and respect you for who, and what, you are.

3. Look at your ability to set boundaries. Ask yourself, “What requests and behaviours are unacceptable to me?” Can you separate what’s normal from what’s unreasonable? Do you know what it feels like to be treated with respect? Are you able to say “no” and enforce good boundaries?

4. Look at your background and your family life. A lot of people pleasers were raised in families that expected full compliance – so their needs were not considered. Instead, they were expected to join in, to keep their feelings to themselves, to do what others wanted, and not ask for anything.

5. Don’t look to others for your self-esteem. It is good to be kind and to think of other people – but you must do that out of choice not a need for approval. And if you let other people determine your self-worth then you’ll never be free to a unique individual.

6. Learn to say “no” without explaining yourself. Don’t think of explanations, or justify yourself, or explain your different reasons, or ask to be excused. You’ll be surprised to discover people rarely take offense - and the people who do are not the ones you want to please!

7. Start to ask for what you want. Start to share your opinions, desires and ideas. Begin to make some requests, and to disagree with others. We’re all individuals with different preferences and healthy relationships are based on give and take.

notyouraveragepornblog: blasianxbri: mamamorgantayl0r: Th...

Fri, 24 May 2013 22:32:14 +1000

notyouraveragepornblog:

blasianxbri:

mamamorgantayl0r:

This is beautiful. And on the topic of sleepovers and kids getting stuck in uncomfortable situations: My mom and I had a code, ever since my first sleepover. I would always call home to say goodnight, and if I asked “How is the cat doing?”, it meant that I wasn’t comfortable and I wanted her to pick me up. I did use this code a few times, and whenever I did, my mom came up with the excuses for me. I was never stuck at a sleepover I didn’t want to be at - and as a child with anxiety and social phobia, this was a great system.

stuff, and stuff like that: l-silvermoon: On that point, do guys ever get told they’ll change...

Fri, 24 May 2013 22:31:31 +1000

stuff, and stuff like that: l-silvermoon: On that point, do guys ever get told they’ll change...:

l-silvermoon:

l-silvermoon:

On that point, do guys ever get told they’ll change their minds about wanting kids? Or are their choices left alone? Because I am going to get all kinds of mad if that’s the case.

sirisles replied to your post:
of course us guys get our own choices… ‘cause sexism and misogyny…

itapanchuu said: It’s just because we’re at a early point in our lives, and they think that making big decisions now doesn’t necessarily mean we’ll keep those ideas forever..??????

I don’t know, but it’s stupid. And I always get told that I WILL change my mind, never, NEVER, that I might. It’s like, bam, when I’m 30, some switch is supposed to flick in my head and I’ll suddenly be gaga over small, screaming people who do nothing but shit everywhere.

And as was pointed out with Siriles’ contribution- it’s never the case with men. Want to focus on your career only, boy? Yup, that’s cool. You don’t ever want kids? Fair enough.

It’s probably because there’s a huge load of sexism in the world at the moment. Women are supposed to have a family and pop out like three children, but they’d better stay skinny and have a full-time job and a husband because else how dare they live up to society’s expectations without living up to society’s expectations!

not to mention there’s this generalised idea that women are gonna meet the man of their dreams and suddenly want a truck load of kids regardless of their sexuality, gender, personal morals, and personal goals.

Seriously, it’s some major bullshit that all this sexism is still happening because wow can we not and just treat women like they know what the fuck they’re doing in life and just treat them like people???

twistedshoelaces:

Fri, 24 May 2013 22:26:23 +1000

twistedshoelaces:

transqueery: the-box-ticker: Five Ways to Spot Somebody...

Fri, 24 May 2013 22:22:21 +1000

transqueery:

the-box-ticker:

Five Ways to Spot Somebody Suffering from Transphobia

arimaarie: commanderqwibqwib: royvios: My life is complete...

Fri, 24 May 2013 22:21:57 +1000

arimaarie:

commanderqwibqwib:

royvios:

My life is complete now that I have found this.

IF THERE ISN’T ALREADY, SOMEONE MAKE A FEMSHEP ONE OF HER GOING

“reapers”

DONE.

wildandwild: [x]

Fri, 24 May 2013 22:20:28 +1000

wildandwild:

[x]

earthlynation: F*** Off

Fri, 24 May 2013 22:02:51 +1000

earthlynation:

F*** Off

Photo

Fri, 24 May 2013 22:02:23 +1000

lychgate: no way guys

Fri, 24 May 2013 22:01:43 +1000

lychgate:

no way guys

Tumblr app: I'm done loading

Fri, 24 May 2013 21:58:12 +1000

Tumblr app: I'm done loading
Me: but what about all these blank pictures and gifs
Tumblr app: did I fucking stutter

Photo

Fri, 24 May 2013 21:56:47 +1000

lycanandproud: brodinsons: when you happen to mention never personally wanting to have kids and...

Fri, 24 May 2013 21:55:13 +1000

lycanandproud:

brodinsons:

when you happen to mention never personally wanting to have kids and someone decides to butt in and remind you not to worry and that “you’ll change your mind in time”

#I’m with Javert on this one

just-laff: egberts: if i ever met a genie i wouldnt wish for a million dollars id wish that...

Fri, 24 May 2013 21:54:59 +1000

just-laff:

egberts:

if i ever met a genie i wouldnt wish for a million dollars id wish that whenever i bought something i’d always have the right amount of money to pay for it in my pocket

you are one of the great thinkers of our time

Photo

Fri, 24 May 2013 21:53:56 +1000

ssophoo: blightwalker: drtoof: it’s called the Xbox One because they took 359 steps back Best...

Fri, 24 May 2013 21:45:10 +1000

ssophoo:

blightwalker:

drtoof:

it’s called the Xbox One because they took 359 steps back

Best joke. everyone else can go home.

Xbox go home

that moment when people you follow make impossibly cute and relatable posts but you’re not...

Fri, 24 May 2013 21:44:11 +1000

that moment when people you follow make impossibly cute and relatable posts but you’re not sure if you can tell them they’re cute because they mightn’t like it

staff: magsby: petition for tumblr staff to leave we don’t want to be here anyway david karp...

Fri, 24 May 2013 21:41:07 +1000

staff:

magsby:

petition for tumblr staff to leave

we don’t want to be here anyway

david karp holds us hostage

send help

purgatorydean: wait guys but what if the Doctor’s real name was just Sweetie this entire time

Fri, 24 May 2013 21:41:05 +1000

purgatorydean:

wait guys but what if the Doctor’s real name was just Sweetie this entire time